Sunday, December 18, 2011

Weekend At Willies The Fall Of Orion

Water in the desert.

It sinks into the ground, it evaporates in the sun, and it opens portals.

Your eyes are portals, windows to your soul.

They are also windows to other souls.

A watery angel, a long forgotten desert cowboy ghost from ze old vile vest, …well, perhaps this little box in which we navigate our short time on a tiny blue marble, alone in the vast eternity of space, is not all there is.


The rain pummeled the Fuck out of FuckNo, and this left No.

Katheena pressed her accelerator pedal all the way down.

Orion grinned.

Then he opened his throaty valves and sang his demon song.

He screamed in pleasure, and shot in between the two rear vehicles.

You must never attempt the following. It is evil to do such a thing, and you may cause others harm. You may even die.

Katheena swung left and braked.

When she swung left, her Endura bumper nudged the left car over, and its rear wheels lost traction.

That car on the left was in a new trajectory, which was diagonal to the right.

It slammed into the car on the right, and they were married in their new path of life, together.

The went off the road for a honeymoon at The Dunes.

Katheena had braked to avoid that squealing, angry mess that followed. The next couple of cars up ahead saw what she had done, and they braked hard.

She swerved to avoid them and she went into the dunes as well. Then they sped off again.

I saw lights flashing about in the Maserati’s rearview mirror, and I had no clue what in hell had happened.

If I had, you know that I would have went right back there.

I chust was not thinking.

Menomena, Evil Bee.

Sean drove faster and faster. I think, looking back, that he was racing the rain. He wanted to escape the desert baptism that would inevitably ensue.

Tellesco kept up to his beloved savior Sean, and Joey was chust along for the ride.

My skin crawled. Those assholes behind us would not give up on trying to follow us.

Something bad had happened, and something else bad was about to happen.

I chust didn’t know it yet.

Fuck it, my instinct screamed at me in my head.

Turn around and fight.

Indeed, this is what my nerves were telling me.

No flee.


So I smashed that brake pedal down.

The Maserati Bora began to swing around and around on the slick tar, but we stayed on the tar. Those other vehicles seemed like they wanted to play chicken, but only for a second.

They swung around me and skidded into the mud of the damp desert dust, and they skidded and flung mud everywhere around them. But they got back onto the tar.

I faced south, towards Fuckno.

Against my instinct, I did not get out and fight.

Something else was calling to me.

I had no idea what.


The Maserati hummed to me. I pressed her fun button down, and she responded with a silky moan. Then she sang to me.

I needed to go back to the other lights off both sides of the road.

As I drove to them, I passed a horse-drawn wagon heading north.

What The Fuck?

A sole figure rode up front, in the driver’s seat.

As he passed, I turned to look at it. There was a white circle A painted on its side.


There was a sideways ellipsis of lights on the right, and beyond, on the left, headlamps shining all around on a hump way off to the left.

An ellipsis looks like this

. . .

A sideways ellipsis looks like this

I pulled over to the car on the right, so see what was going on.

I zipped up my leather and got out. The rain felt like shards of ice.

A long, beautiful golden car lied on its side.

A large pool of rain water reflected the lower headlamp into my eyes.

The car was drowning in the pouring desert rain on its driver side, ass end deep, nose pointing up chust a little bit.






Joey looked behind him and saw some headlights growing closer. Joey pressed down on his old fashioned accelerator pedal, but there was no more for him, from her.

She was an older car who was doing her best to provide him with pleasure, but she was from a different era, when cars did not have fuel injection, or turbo, or Positraction, and they were made out of cast iron stove metal, not with plastic.

Those rich bastards were on their way to him, for him.

Little Lion Man was always ready for a scrap.

In the rain, he saw a solitary figure in the road up ahead. It stood to the side of the road. It held out a thumb. It was hitchhiking.



The horse-drawn carriage raced towards the vehicles up ahead. The horse’s metal-shoed hooves clicked blue sparks in the rain, and its mane began to glow with a blue fames. It was overtaking the rearmost vehicles.

It flew up and then drove through them, and went past. It disappeared. And then it was coming back at them. The horse and the carriage were now glowing blue light.

The figure in the driver’s seat stood up and pointed a double-barrel shotgun at them, and then a blast erupted.

The light from the blast scared the hell out them two drivers and they panicked.

Do not panic.

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I slogged over to Orion in the desert mud, with the howl of wind and pelting of rain in my face.

How dare---

Who the fuck had----

I had almost left her----

Orion rumbled on his side and his rear wheels were still spinning.

The one in the dirt had dug a new grave.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Joey slowed to a stop and looked up at the figure outside of his old, classic car, and he could not see her face.

His skin shivered, even though he had the old heater up all the way.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Sean could not see us anymore in his rearview mirror. This was because Tellesco was tailgating him.

Tellesco would never be abandoned again. He would





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God Help You.

God Help Us All.

---willies out

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