Tired from my week in Sam’s Town. Good to be home.
Now is the day when everyone claims to have some Irish in them. From way back when, some where along the way, some ancestor fucked a Mc. That happens to me a lot. No, not fucking a Mc, but the ancestor thing. “Oh, I’ve got some Indian in me. My great great grandmother was an Indian Princess. Cherokee, I think.” Man, that Cherokee princess got around back then, didn’t she.
So on this day, take your kids to a parade, or find some place that sells green beer, and start drinking at noon like a proper celebrant. Kiss me, I’m Irish today.
Don’t forget to properly hydrate before, during, and after your weekend binge, my friend.
Just be careful you don’t do something crazy that you will regret. Instead, do crazy things that make others regret knowing you.
Kony founder got caught for masturbating in public, so here’s his meltdown caught on video..
Masturbating in public is frowned upon. You know what causes masturbation? Pornography. Rick Santorum has the answer. Go after pornography. It’s obscene. Goodbye internets, it was nice knowing you.
Speaking of baboons, they kidnap puppies and train them. Rough at first, but check it out.
Here’s how our lovely moon evolved.
Now here’s an awesome short called Ruin.
Updating your Facebook page while you drive is dangerous.
Doing a loop de loop in a car is dangerous, too.
Even more dangerous, ejecting from a fighter jet at 800 MPH.
Lesson: Be dangerous, but not too dangerous. Be a little dangerous. Just don’t hurt anyone else with your dangerosity.
Here’s a tune to carry you on your way. Happy Saint Patrick's Day to you, ya temporary Mc.
God Help You.
God Help Us All.
OK, One More For You. NSFW in honor of Rick Santorum.
Oh, yeah. The Weekend Willies Story Continues...