Wednesday, July 25, 2012

I Want To Punch This Dude Who Hasn't Watched TV Since 1988 In The Face So Bad I Can Taste It

UK - NEIGHBOURS may have bagged the 5.35pm slot to which most of the country was glued and Crossroads with its wobbly stage sets was in its last year – but one man from Southborough wasn’t watching. In 1988 Andrew Lohmann, 53, ditched his television for good. He said he had developed “a terrible habit of watching television” to the detriment of a social life and engaging with the world around him. The electronics engineer, who told the Courier he had never seen footage of the passenger jets exploding into the World Trade Center in 2001 and was only “aware” Britain’s Got Talent was a programme, said: “When I left home I thought, don’t bother with the TV. I had a lovely flat in the town centre, lovely neighbours and lots of things to do.” But in his twenties he got in to “bad habits” with the set in the living room. “It was easy to just watch TV. It drew me in,” he said. “I was a bit ‘junk TV’ because I was at home. I didn’t read a lot – I am dyslexic – so I was taking other people’s impressions of things on the television. It was just too easy to watch it.”

Aside from the Colorado Dark Knight shooter, Rick Reilly, and Hitler I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to punch somebody in the face more than Andrew fucking Lohmann. FUCK this guy. Smug prick just oozing smugness out of the computer screen. Look at me, I’m so intelligent, I’m such an intellectual, I don’t have time for TV, I just like to focus on engaging with the world around me and having a social life. Bro how do you even engage with the world without TV? What do you talk about? Did you make a social circle out of the 14 people left in the world who still read newspapers? What do you do at night? Read books? Do puzzles? You’ve really never seen Breaking Bad or Revenge or the first season of 24? What kind of life is that? No life at all if you ask me. Listen there is nothing wrong with TV. It doesn’t make you dumber. On the contrary it makes you capable of being able to keep up with the real world. You can catch breaking news as it happens. You can be entertained. You can know what’s happening all over the world with the click of a remote. But by all means keep trying to figure out a way to hold your 1000 page newspaper and track down the section where the 24 hour old story continues in the back somewhere smart guy.

PS- I like how the article uses “9/11 footage” and “Britain’s Got Talent” as the 2 examples of groundbreaking television. Two TV events of equal importance.

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